Faith - The Royal Way

Brother Andrew's faith is truly awesome. He relies on God for many things that I have taken my own responsibility for. Direction, payment for his expenses, his personal safety, getting himself out of tight spots. What do I rely on God for? My happiness???

All My Desires

All my desires are selfish. When I think about how I want my life to be in the future - my family, my career, where I want to go, etc. It is all centered around me. What I enjoy doing, what I like to learn or think about... If I could only purge myself of this constant fantasy world, I would be a free man! I would for the first time have a clear mind.

There's a popular bumper sticker that says "Question Authority". I think it should say "Question Your Fantasies". All our fantasies I would bet are 100% wrong. They are nothing more than lies. Have you ever experienced something that you anticipated greatly, where you had spent many hours thinking about how it would play out? How did the experience compare to how you dreamed it would be? Not very similar, huh? Probabaly not even close. Your fantasies don't consider the negative side - difficulties or unpleasantries - your mind just thinks it's going to be exactly the way you want it to be.

Brother Andrew wanted adventure so he decided to be a commando in the Dutch Army. He didn't consider that he was going to be killing people and seeing horrific scenes. He became so disgusted with himself that he eventually wanted to get killed. He didn't consider that God had a plan for him that was better than his plan, and it also included the adventure he was looking for.

Even though I know all this I still engage in this folly.

Dear God, I pray that you will remove the fantasies, that are nothing more than lies, from my mind. Fill my mind with what I can do to fulfill the needs of those in my life that are close to me. My fantasies are not as important as the needs of those around me. Lori, Sarah, my parents, my siblings, friends, and co-workers. I know that your plan far exceeds my own imagination.

God's Smuggler

Recently finished reading God's Smuggler by Brother Andrew. It's hard for me to put a finger on how this book has affected me. I'm going to write a few thoughts to help me clear my head.

I think what hit home to me right away was the fact that Brother Andrew, after he came home from the war with a bad foot, wasn't happy with himself and didn't know what to do next. At the end of each day I am not happy with how I have conducted myself - I am continuing to do the things that hurt me most, and isolate me. Each day I also wonder where I am going to go with my life; especially my career. I keep thinking that a path will be laid down for me but I am doing nothing to search for the path.

Each day, I want to say a prayer similar to what Brother Andrew said:

"Lord, if You will show me the way, I will follow You. Amen."

He said this AFTER commiting himself to the Lord and letting go of the thing that was holding him back. Something is still holding me back. I'm not exactly sure what it is, but fear and pride are part of it. I need to spend a lot of time thinking this over.

Thoughts for Today

What good is it, my brothers, if a man claims to have faith but has no deeds? Can such faith save him? Suppose a brother or sister is without clothes and daily food. If one of you says to him, "Go, I wish you well; keep warm and well fed," but does nothing about his physical needs, what good is it? In the same way, faith by itself, if it is not accompanied by action, is dead. (James 2:14-17)

You want something but don't get it. You kill and covet, but you cannot have what you want. You quarrel and fight. You do not have, because you do not ask God. When you ask, you do not receive, because you ask with wrong motives, that you may spend what you get on your pleasures. (James 4:3)

Now listen, you who say, "Today or tomorrow we will go to this or that city, spend a year there, carry on business and make money." Why, you do not even know what will happen tomorrow. What is your life? You are a mist that appears for a little while and then vanishes. Instead, you ought to say, "If it is the Lord's will, we will live and do this or that." (James 4:13-15)

I want to keep these verses in mind when I pray about my career ambitions, and our desire to move to Colorado Springs

Getting started

First post.  Just getting a feel for things.